The Rotten Royals

Yesterday I found a news item about Johnny Rotten (from the Sex Pistols), who revealed his thoughts on Diana and Camilla. Not particularly flattering comments, but what did you expect from the singer of God Save The Queen?

Johnny Rotten is filming a documentary and I take it, decided to insult the royals in order to get some publicity. But the punchline of this story is that Johnny is looking for members of the royal family to appear in this documentary! Well, at least he insulted Diana (who can’t reply), and Camilla (the verdict is still out). Who’s left? The Queen? Nope. Prince Philip, doubt it. Hmmmm, maybe Princess Michael of Kent is available.

Johnny, a word of advice: Don’t insult her if she is.

Is Prince William the next Royal Bridegroom?

Once again, speculation is rife that Kate Middleton will become the next ‘Windsor generation’s fairy-tale bride’. All the ‘signs’ are there: the couple are building a ‘love nest’, Kate is getting ‘bodyguards’, and 63% of Hello readers favor the match.

Although never officially confirmed, Prince William and Kate Middleton have been dating for at least three years and she seems to be his first truly serious girlfriend. But isn’t it a bit premature to discuss marriage? Prince William is still only 23 years old, way too young to be getting married, let alone thinking of it. There’s still plenty of time. Besides, the sooner he’s married, the sooner the rumors of trouble will start.

However, should Prince William marry now he will be the youngest royal bridegroom since 1863. His great-great-great grandfather, King Edward VII was 21 when he married.  It will also be the first time since 1893, when an heir to an heir to the throne married. This was his great-great grandfather, King George V, the son of King Edward VII. When Prince Charles married in 1981, at the age of 32 he was, comparatively, the oldest royal bridegroom in recent history. In 2005 he beat his own record by marrying at the age of 56.

Despite Prince William’s age, marrying young can work. Just ask his grandmother, the Queen, who married when she was 21. She’s been married for almost 59 years and it’s still going strong.  Charles and Diana aside, the marriages of heirs to the throne have good track records. King Edward VII was married for 47 years, King George V for 43, and King George VI for 29 years. And all of them married when they were under 30, so age is not necessarily a factor.

Will Prince William be the next royal bridegroom?

We’ll have to wait and see.

The Queen’s Castle eludes me

I really enjoy watching royal documentaries. No matter what the subject, how often I’ve heard the information or seen the footage, I’m fascinated. But there’s one documentary that keeps eluding me.

The Queen’s Castle is a three part documentary on Windsor Castle, and I have seen half of Part 2 and the whole of Part 3 but I have never seen Part 1. Unbeknownst to me it was on at Christmas time, and once again I missed it. The series was on the other night, but unfortunately it was on a cable channel that I don’t subscribe to!

I was delighted when I found it on dvd. Finally, I get to watch it whenever I want! It seemed too good to be true. It was. The dvd doesn’t work on North American players!

Will I ever see the entire documentary? 😦

A Royal Birthday Gift Suggestion

I’m an avid collector of books on royalty. Friends who have helped me move my books have said I’m too avid. My collection also includes, plates, stamps, magazines, cups, and I’ll even admit to a Franklin Mint Diana doll.

I love adding to my collection, but when it comes to royal items as gifts, I’m a hard person to buy for. However, there is something I don’t have. My birthday is coming up (March 2nd), so if you have an extra $20,000 lying around, why not buy me plaster casts of Diana’s feet? 

The Queen hires contract killers

Disgruntled employees thinking of writing tell all books beware, the Queen has hired contract killers to carry out her dirty work. Six men, on a mission, in Her Majesty’s Service. It’s a large job, it could take a year, and it won’t be easy; moving targets make it challenging. But these men are expert marksmen and they’ll see to it that the job is done.

Of course, it’s not an arbitrary mission. There’s a reason for it – yes, there’s always a reason. Who benefits? The wealthy landowner, that’s who. A £500,000 bonus and all the venison you can eat? It’s a win, win, tasty, situation.

But it’s not only about the wealthy landowners, it’s also about the environment.

Still, Paul Burrell, I’d watch your back.